Life after Marriage

Human life is filled with a lot of events, some small and temporary events and others are life-long. Humans have so many relationships and events throughout the journey of their life. Marriage is one of the precious and life-changing events for a couple.

 To marriage someone means to become a part of someone's life, to share everything with someone, to accept someone and start a new chapter of your life. Different countries have different cultures and different kinds of traditions for marriage. In India marriage is like a festival. Two persons, as well as their family, make a new relationship.

After marriage, you have to prepare yourself to face different kinds of situations and it requires to do some adjustments in work, finances, communication, dealing in-laws, etc…  A new journey with new challenges so, you need to understand some basic rules and plan everything as per your needs.

Communication: Marriage is a give and takes relationship. You give something and take something that you needed. To make it happen you need to understand your partner very well, and for this, you have very good communication.

If you are not communicating then after a certain time as human nature you will feel, I am giving more, the other person is giving less. This communication gap makes differences and sooner or later you start arguing or fighting on trivial matters.

   "Communication to a relationship is like oxygen to life. ..."

Communication is about understanding your partner’s point of view, his need and supporting your partner in every situation. Be open and honest. As we grow our values, likes and dislikes changes as well so you should share everything with your partner even things are good or bad.     

Handling arguments: Man and woman are physically, kind of opposite. Everyone is unique and has different thinking from others, so sometimes arguments are obvious maybe with your partner as well as in-laws. That time sharing and living together become a struggle. So how to tackle these situations is crucial.

You should stop being a man or woman all the time. You no need to carry your manhood or womanhood the whole day. It ruins your relationship joy and happiness. Yes, there are certain responsibilities, you have as man and woman but, that is only a part of your life. Apart from just live as a loving human being and enjoy every moment with each other

Only in moments of love, can a man and woman really be together. Love can be a solution because it brings compassion, sacrifices, and forgiveness. Sometimes misunderstanding happens for that only understanding can be a solution. Let your partner allow discussing things and listen to his/her point before jumping to any conclusion.

In India, we are often seen conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Biologically women have possessive nature and an instinctive rejection or resistance to other women coming in your life because now she required to share someone who belongs to her with someone else. A mother is being possessive to her child that’s why she cares more about a child.

As a mother, she wants to get married her son and she will be happy. But at the same time, she has to share his son with his wife. It means she has to take permission to share something that belongs to her completely before. It is a little difficult to understand and strange as well. As a woman, she needs to grow out of it and understand the facts everything belongs to her will go one day.    

Be yourself: In married life, you have to take care of your partner as well as yourself. You both need to learn to be individual at the same time. Live with your purpose and give time for the things that makes you happy. If you feel joy within, you will naturally do great things to others.

As individuals think about your actions and behavior from your partner’s perspective and analyze that you expect this kind of behavior from them. Don’t blame your partner for deeds, maybe, you both or individually responsible for that. This will keep you on the right track and make you understand if you do anything wrong.  

Long term goals: As you are going to live together for lifelong there will be some common things you both want to do. Apart from it you can decide your finances, your role in the family, discuss children, and where you want to be in 10 years or last days of life, plan your retirement and some career plans.

Together you can make plans of how you going to spend your money like buying a home or car, traveling, children's expenses, education expenses and saving some money. I personally suggest saving for emergencies like medical bills, without a job, etc… You can decide your goals how much and when to spend your money to make your life comfortable.

When you ready to extend your family for your next-generation you can plan how many children you want?  Children are the mirror of your childhood after children start a new chapter of life. You can decide your role towards them and how you want to bring up them.

Retirement is a major phase of life after that you have no earning officially so you can plan your life after retirement. You can decide from both who can manage funds better and saving accounts. You can either save some money or invest in some venture from which you can get a good return.

So these are some points if you remember and implement, your married life will become beautiful and smooth. Marriage life is a beautiful journey.

        “Couples are made in heaven but a couple can make a heaven for them with love,                           understanding and proper planning.”